My TV is set to auto-tune Joseph Prince for every time slot from 5am through 9:30am, so I hear the Gospel preached before I hear anything else. I still felt BAD. I took my Bible and prated for the Lord to wash me with His Goodness and Love. Instead of an instant calm and peace, I got a scripture: John 3:19. This is one scripture that has somewhat eluded my understanding.
19 Their judgment is based on this fact: The light from heaven came into the world, but they loved the darkness more than the light, for their actions were evil.
I watched a video yesterday that has been replaying in my head--I will post at the end. The context here is Jesus speaking to a respected Jewish religious leader, a Pharisee, about being Born Again. As a Pharisee, Nicodemus was very well taught in The Law, and knew the blessings and curses that came with the Law. But Jesus said, God did not send me into the world to condemn it but to save it--verse 18 "There is no judgement awaiting those who trust him (Me-Jesus). But those who do not trust him(Jesus) have already been judged for not believing in The only Son of God. So in verse 19, let me substitute some words for simplicity, the reason why judgement had fell on some was unbelief in Jesus. They loved the darkness (their way of becoming right with God--the Pharisee's way--the Law) for their actions (their unbelief) were evil.
Verse twenty says they hate the light(Jesus) because they want to sin in darkness. In other words, they want to be in unbelief(sin) and hide in darkness(their trust in the Law). I can substitute Jesus here for light. Read John 8: 12 I am the Light... I can substitute unbelief for sin and for deeds. Read John 6:28-29 I pray for Holy Spirit to remove any veil that separates any heart from understanding God's Grace which is a person Jesus.
After this revelation, I did not feel bad anymore--all pain was gone--I realized that I had the only real goodness that there is in this world --in me--Thank You Father for Jesus---Be Blessed---c